This summer I started going to a Tibetan group on Sundays. Its weird because everytime I go, I play in my head “Why am I doing this? Is this the right thing to do?” especially during the days we do the chanting like today. But then while I do it, I feel great. I feel connected and peaceful and that the whole world is right. I feel so great when I am done and for the rest of the day, usually the whole week, I feel peaceful and able to recognize the craziness in my mind as something rather than “me”.
I also think I should do what I can to schedule my meditations. That way I don’t feel rushed at the end of the day. It is nice to have it be 9 o’clock and I’m not thinking, “Oh, I need to go meditate” But that would take planning and I’m not sure I am capable of that in this moment! My mind is pretty random and I noticed today, as I was setting up my room, I started doing one thing and then noticed something else I could do so did that and repeated that process until I realized it was time to go! Haha! That’s why I have to set my phone alarm for important things…and why my journal makes no sense to anyone but me.


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