Why would God do this? He tells Abraham to give his son as offering. As a mother, I know it would be impossible for me. And I always thought love was the way through which everything gets done. But then I think, it is love that God is asking Abraham to prove and this is in a time where people are not accustomed to giving with no expectation of return. Is that why it was asked of him?

Or is it also asked of every parent who loses a child? It doesn’t matter the means. There are those whose faith is strengthened. They say God has taken the child home. Others see it as a punishment and turn their backs on God.

One thing I know for sure, control is an illusion. Abraham might have thought he had the choice. But the truth is, God chose not to take the boy that day. Even if Abraham would have refused God, the boys life was never in his hands. Maybe that was the lesson to learn. So many get caught up in the idea that the choices we make and the paths we follow determine what we get or don’t get. But God can cause sickness at any time. He can also cause miracles in healing. A doctor can do all that she can and still lose a patient and at the same time, a man can have supposed to die, yet live.

It is true in all instances of life. There are many falsely imprisoned while others walk free. There are those who win the lotto and others who lose their jobs.

What is in our control? Our thoughts? Perhaps, but I have spent time meditating and those tend to spiral out of control.

I guess there are some instances of free will. I can choose to pull the trigger or put the gun down. But the truth of the matter is, if God told me to put the gun down and I choose to pull the trigger, I WILL suffer. If I do not walk with God, I will feel pain. If I give myself to God and trust in him that he has a purpose for me and my life, I will be comforted.

I pray that God will speak loudly to me.

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