I knew you would return. It happened late last night, in the midst of all my laughter, when the blackness started to seep into my pores. You know I hate you. But I know I asked for this.

All I really wanted though, was to be wrapped up in love. The love that only one who is so fully invested can pour out over another. I ask for this, yet I don’t know how to give it anymore. My well has run dry and I expect my love to fill it. I hear the foolishness, yet it can’t replace the knife twisting in my chest. All the words in the world can’t repair the damage.

I’ll welcome you. Oh, it’s you, pain. I remember you so well. You haunt me from time to time. You can sit here awhile, I guess, because I don’t even know the things that fill you up enough to leave me alone. Maybe someday I’ll figure that out, and you’ll leave me forever. But when you leave, I also sit in the fear of your lurking around the corner, and I wonder if you’ve become a part of me, so that I wouldn’t even be me without you.


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